Fun things to tell a manager...

Here are the top 5 fun things to tell your manager. I gathered these from many informal conversations with many experts ... They could be severely career limiting, so use them at your own risk... :)

1. General Chat - I love to work in your group; it ensures that there is atleast one person more incompetent than me.
   
   
2. When discussing career growth and opportunities - I have left many companies in my short career and I won't hesitate to do it again.
   
   
3. During the performance review - What do you mean - "Your performance is not up to expectation"? I wrote many more mails than you did!
   
   
4. On Design Discussions - I really like the free flow of ideas that we enable by encouraging people to get drunk before closing on major design decisions. Our product is richer for that fact!
   
   
5. On Integrity - Can you teach me how you can lie with such a straight face without letting shame or embarrasment show?